I am not sure if you all know of the battle that I have been fighting for Michael over the past 18 or so months for both mental and physical health care but it has been crazy and today I really feel defeated and it really is not going to hurt Michael if he does not get these therapies that I am fighting for but it would really HELP him for his future. I also feel as everyone close to me (except grandma) thinks I am over doing it and pushing to hard for him and that hurts even more. I really don't know what to think anymore and maybe I am just to deep in it to see what everyone else seems to see and think. This is what I found out today from his EARLY INTERVENTION REVIEW that was today:
1. He has a major speech delay
Receptive Communication Age Equivalent: 7months
Expressive Communication Age Equivalent: 11 months
But do to the fact that he has Kaiser Medi-cal they will not offer him speech therapy unless I get a denial Letter stating that Kaiser will not pay for speech therapy which Kaiser wont do because he is Medi-cal and it gets more complicated from there.
2. He should be in Occupational Therapy
Fine Motor Skills Age Equivalent: 9months
Adaptive/Self-Help Age Equivalent: 11months
Cognitive skills:
Attention and Memory Age Equivalent: 7months
Perception and Concepts Age Equivalent: 11months
So again they will not give him O.T. because they need a denial letter for this as well.
Over the past 8 months I have read books and gone to classes to learn and understand how to best help Michael. I have learn some about speech therapy, some about O.T. and a lot about sensory integration and sensory seeking children. I have been working with Michael daily for 45 minutes in the mornings and 45 minutes in the afternoon. He sees Stacie a FMTI once a week. She has been my best resource in all of this. Together we have learned the best ways to get through to Michael. He also sees his Early intervention therapist once a week. Because of all of this we have seen so much improvement in his langue and his ability to interact with people and children! But there is still a lot more and I don't know how or if I can help him go much further. To be honest I am scared because as far as discipline there is none. He really does not understand NO! He runs away from me more and more and since Tuesday running into the street!!! He can open all doors now so he can get in to anything or get out of the house! We have to move all the locks up high, he can open the frig, reach the stove and open the oven so now the Kitchen is off limits! The bathroom I wont even go there. I feel like nothing is safe for him. He eats/puts in his mouth all non food items but when it comes to feed all most nothing goes in! Our poor cats I am really supersized he has not hurt them yet! They are locked up almost all the time in our bedroom. But most of all I worry about how he is with Kaylee! He is so ruff and physical with her. He pulls her hair, crashes into her, and never gives her a moment to herself unless she locks herself in her room.
I am guessing that some of these behaviors are do to his langue delays but still what do I do? I just don't know anymore. Kaiser did evaluate him and gave him a diagnosis of autism spectrum disorder level 1 and I thought that would be all that I needed to get him help but it is not.
Are all the people who think I am over reacting right? Am I just to far into this to see that he is really okay? Maybe I am. He is not even 2 yet! He is at least getting some help and if I keep working with him maybe that is all that he needs. All that I know is I just can't fight anymore and that makes me feel like a really bad mother but I am burnt out and kinda out of options. If we could I would just pay out of pocket and screw all this insurance crap believe me I would! And you want to know the really sad part is that this is just for his mental health and you should hear all the stuff for his physical health! I don't understand why Michael is my child. I am waiting for God to show me the answer to that one.
Friday, July 29, 2016
Tuesday, July 12, 2016
A little bit of everything and some more. Most import is that Michael is FINALLY going to get all the help he needs.
Here is all that's being going on:
Life has been so crazy since my last post. The one thing I have realized it that the craziness is only going to get more crazy! LOL I helped with a week of VBS which was awesome. We did a joint VBS with Prince of Peace. It brought somethings to my attention that I had not notice and maybe wanted to see so now I am having a very hard time these days with church/faith. I really can't put a finger on it so I am also trying to work through that as well and leave it at that. I know that God is always with me even if I don't think so or want it to be so.
I had a few issues after my hysterectomy one being that I ended up with mastitis in my left breast which turned into a bigger issue than I had hoped it would. I had an ultrasound and then a biopsy and so on. Finally last week I was able to get everything taken care of and I am in a lot less pain. They have also have deiced to change my hormone therapy around as well so I have been kind of grumpy. I have also gone back to therapy once week. There has been so much stuff going on this past year and a half that I was starting to feel like I could not breath. At least I am starting to feel better.
Kaylee was sick as well with her first ever UTI as well as a Vitamin D deficiency. Kaylee does not drink milk of any type and only eats yogurt randomly these days. So she is now on Vitamin D drops. The poor kid. She has also had a hard time with school being out. She talks about it almost daily. She had VBS the last week of June and loved it. I can not wait for school to start in September for her. It will be at a new school but I know she will love it.
Michael was really sick again starting the end of June and beginning of July. It started with both kids having pink eye and then turned into a massive infection for Michael. We did not really know that he was not feeling well until we noticed yellow puss like stuff draining from his ear:
The poor kid never acts like he is in pain. When we took him in the doctor could not believe how happy he was. So by the end of his appointment we left with 2 oral antibiotics, antibiotic ear drops and was told to keep him on Benadryl for the next 2 months. I still could not believe the smell that came out of his ear either. Yuck!
But the besting ever finally happened! Michael received a diagnosis finally from Kaiser. Michael had a 2 day evaluation done by a pediatric psychologist and a speech and O.T. therapist. This is something I have been hoping for! Not for a diagnosis per say but because there is a diagnosis he will receive treatment and therapy's that he was denied do to the fact he had no diagnosis. No more fighting with Kaiser! The Psychologist was very impressed that I had started getting him services through Kidango and Early Start so young but said because of that I have helped him more than they could have if I had waited! He will start Behavioral Health Treatment or ABA treatment as well as speech and occupational therapy! My goal as a mother is to help my children to be self-sufficient and happy and that is why I am fighting so hard for all of this for Michael. The sooner he receives the help the better. Yes he is young but there is no harm in extra help.
I have been worried about Grandma ever since her last stay in the hospital. I can tell it took a lot out of her physically. I know that her time is sooner rather than later but I still hate it! I try my best to help her but she still drives me crazy. I try not to loss my temper but sometimes I just can't take it. I know that she is worried about Lewis and I. I have told her over and over again that Lewis and I have each other and that's a lot but I still think she thinks we are just kids! I also think she is worried about Janet having to deal with everything. She really like her birthday gift I put together for her with the help of her family and friends. "93 reasons why you are loved and appreciated"! I catch her looking at it a lot. I just wish she could have one day of no worrying. I try to have my kids over to see her as much as possible because there is nothing better in the whole world than watching her with my kids.
The last thing that Ken and I are trying to figure out is MONEY! Ken and I are so happy with what we have: 2 great kids, a strong marriage, a great place to live, food to eat, 2 cars, and so much more than we need but still we can not pay our bills each month. I am unable to work outside the home do to child care issues and Michael's health. Otherwise I would have a job asap. I really do miss working out in the nursery. Ken has been applying everywhere but so far no luck. He is going to look into get a second job soon. I have a hard time making money more important than family but for now it is. I am sure that we will have to leave the area sooner that either of us wanted too. I wanted to stay for grandma and Ken wanted to stay for his parents but I am not sure if we are able to do that. This month we used the last of our savings. We have 16 more months to pay of my surgery and once that is done maybe we can start saving again. For now I guess we are going to be living paycheck to paycheck but at least we are happy and most importantly the kids are happy.
Life has been so crazy since my last post. The one thing I have realized it that the craziness is only going to get more crazy! LOL I helped with a week of VBS which was awesome. We did a joint VBS with Prince of Peace. It brought somethings to my attention that I had not notice and maybe wanted to see so now I am having a very hard time these days with church/faith. I really can't put a finger on it so I am also trying to work through that as well and leave it at that. I know that God is always with me even if I don't think so or want it to be so.
I had a few issues after my hysterectomy one being that I ended up with mastitis in my left breast which turned into a bigger issue than I had hoped it would. I had an ultrasound and then a biopsy and so on. Finally last week I was able to get everything taken care of and I am in a lot less pain. They have also have deiced to change my hormone therapy around as well so I have been kind of grumpy. I have also gone back to therapy once week. There has been so much stuff going on this past year and a half that I was starting to feel like I could not breath. At least I am starting to feel better.
Kaylee was sick as well with her first ever UTI as well as a Vitamin D deficiency. Kaylee does not drink milk of any type and only eats yogurt randomly these days. So she is now on Vitamin D drops. The poor kid. She has also had a hard time with school being out. She talks about it almost daily. She had VBS the last week of June and loved it. I can not wait for school to start in September for her. It will be at a new school but I know she will love it.
Michael was really sick again starting the end of June and beginning of July. It started with both kids having pink eye and then turned into a massive infection for Michael. We did not really know that he was not feeling well until we noticed yellow puss like stuff draining from his ear:
But the besting ever finally happened! Michael received a diagnosis finally from Kaiser. Michael had a 2 day evaluation done by a pediatric psychologist and a speech and O.T. therapist. This is something I have been hoping for! Not for a diagnosis per say but because there is a diagnosis he will receive treatment and therapy's that he was denied do to the fact he had no diagnosis. No more fighting with Kaiser! The Psychologist was very impressed that I had started getting him services through Kidango and Early Start so young but said because of that I have helped him more than they could have if I had waited! He will start Behavioral Health Treatment or ABA treatment as well as speech and occupational therapy! My goal as a mother is to help my children to be self-sufficient and happy and that is why I am fighting so hard for all of this for Michael. The sooner he receives the help the better. Yes he is young but there is no harm in extra help.
I have been worried about Grandma ever since her last stay in the hospital. I can tell it took a lot out of her physically. I know that her time is sooner rather than later but I still hate it! I try my best to help her but she still drives me crazy. I try not to loss my temper but sometimes I just can't take it. I know that she is worried about Lewis and I. I have told her over and over again that Lewis and I have each other and that's a lot but I still think she thinks we are just kids! I also think she is worried about Janet having to deal with everything. She really like her birthday gift I put together for her with the help of her family and friends. "93 reasons why you are loved and appreciated"! I catch her looking at it a lot. I just wish she could have one day of no worrying. I try to have my kids over to see her as much as possible because there is nothing better in the whole world than watching her with my kids.
The last thing that Ken and I are trying to figure out is MONEY! Ken and I are so happy with what we have: 2 great kids, a strong marriage, a great place to live, food to eat, 2 cars, and so much more than we need but still we can not pay our bills each month. I am unable to work outside the home do to child care issues and Michael's health. Otherwise I would have a job asap. I really do miss working out in the nursery. Ken has been applying everywhere but so far no luck. He is going to look into get a second job soon. I have a hard time making money more important than family but for now it is. I am sure that we will have to leave the area sooner that either of us wanted too. I wanted to stay for grandma and Ken wanted to stay for his parents but I am not sure if we are able to do that. This month we used the last of our savings. We have 16 more months to pay of my surgery and once that is done maybe we can start saving again. For now I guess we are going to be living paycheck to paycheck but at least we are happy and most importantly the kids are happy.
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