Recovery from surgery and it's nothing like a C-section

I want to thank everyone that helped us out last Friday! I am so thankful to every person in my life that took care of my kids that day. I love and trust so all so much and so do my kids. It's because of you all that I was able to relax and not stress about my kids. 

My surgery went great! It was about an hour longer than expected (total time just over 5 hours) do to a lot of scare tissue everywhere. It took my doctor a long time to remove it. I got to keep an ovary. I am back on hormones again and will be until after menopause. Today it had been 6 days and the pain is so much better. It only really hurts when I stand up, sit down, bend over and lay down. The horrible part it the lack of energy and feeling nauseous all the time (and throwing up). Then the hardest part is not being able to pick up Michael and help with him. I have such a hard time watching him be so frustrated and mad. I know he needs to learn that other people deal with him differently but it still makes my heart hurt. Kaylee is doing great and wants to show everyone my ouchy! She even helps me get up and change my clothes. Ken has been doing great job. He has now told me several times I can't believe you do this everyday and don't loss it! Michael and Ken butt heads a lot. but it is good for them both. Ken has to learn that Michael is much different than Kaylee and you have to deal with them differently. 

My friend Michelle did a meal sign up for us and that has been a life saver. Ken can cook simple stuff but never has enough time. Having dinners 3 times a week is great. Good, healthy and different food for Ken to eat and give the kids each week. I don't know what we would have done with out it. It is the simplest things that make the biggest difference.

I talked with my doctor yesterday about being so sick and feeling so tired. She said you had major surgery and you are doing to much! She thinks I am pushing myself to fast and that my body is telling me to slow down. I don't think I am doing that much at all but I am going to try and do a little less today. I will go in for blood work and then do nothing but rest. I am just not good at doing nothing. I am going to start a new book too. I am hoping that will suck me in enough to want to just sit and read. 

Today I am feeling much better tummy wise I will keep up on my anti-nausea pain medications and sleep as much as possible. Ken goes back to work TOMORROW and I am starting to freak out a bit. My mother in law is coming to be with me all day tomorrow and then a Jennifer is coming to stay with me on Saturday and on Sunday I will be at grandmas. So I think we have it covered but I am scared about how much energy I will have. 

Last 2 weeks and a Hysterectomy (my be T.M.I. for some people)

Almost 3 weeks ago I went in to the both my medical doctor and my OB. I saw my medical doctor for some GI issues I was having so she decided to run some blood work. I was fine with that and went on to my next appointment my O.B. for my regular check up. I take hormones so I go in very 6 months to check in. While there she decided to do a biopsy of my uterus and cervix. I had no idea they could do those in the doctors office but they can and I was extremely supersized that it don't hurt as bad as other things they have done to me. Not thinking much about it I went on with my day. The next morning my doctor called first thing saying there was something up with my liver and they wanted to do a CT scan! So I scheduled it for Friday Ken's next day off and to discuses the results on Monday the 14th in her office. A little concerned but thinking it was not that serious. Then late Wednesday afternoon my OB called and said she wanted to set up an appointment to come in as soon as possible to do some blood work and then talk with her. So I made an appointment on Friday a few hours before my CT scan. Again I was not that worried I figured it was something to do with my hormones or something weird like early menopause or I think you need a D.N.C again.  Well Friday came and I went to talk with my O.B. and well it was something to be worried about. They found pre-cancerous cell in both my cervix and uterus. http://wellescent.com/health_blog/do_i_have_cancer_or_not_and_the_precancerous_cop_out
She was also worried about the amount and length of my last period which I still have that started back in late December! She said we recommend a hysterectomy soon! So I meet the surgeon (who is a year younger than me by the way) right away. She examined me and looked over everything and said we can do this Monday! My mouth dropped to the floor and I said no way. I explained that I needed to find child care and help. So she scheduled it for March 25th 2 weeks away exactly. She also scheduled an ultrasound to do on Monday the 14th since I already had an appointment that day. I had to stop taking my hormones and other medications right away. Which has caused to worse cramps you could ever imagine! Ken and I were still kinda in shock when Monday rolled around. We had a friend to stay with the kids and Ken and I headed back to Kaiser. We did the ultrasound first where they found cysts on my ovaries that I already new I had. They also decided that do to some other issues the surgery could no longer be done vaginally. I was a little bummed. Basically that means an operation similar to a c-section. So recovery is going to take much longer than I hope. Ken and I are still coming to terms with the recovers time but we will survive I hope. After all this we went on to my next appointment the results of the CT scan. Where we found out that I must have had a virus a while back and it played havoc on my liver and all should be fine I just need to do blood work again in a few weeks to check on it. But she said the they found some spots on both of my lungs and wanted to do a CT scan of my chest and to come back at 7pm. At this point I was emotionally done and I felt extremely overwhelmed. Ken and I just could not believe what was going on. It was almost funny.  We went back that night and they did the CT scan of my chest and then we had to wait again. Then on that Wednesday my O.B.'s office called and said I need to come in the Wednesday before my surgery to do blood work and have an EKG done. Great more things to do. I was starting to freak out because we still did not have the CT results. Then my doctor finally called me about the lung CT scan and said they think it is scaring from when I had pneumonia really bad as a child. They want to do a biopsy and redo the CT scan in 6 months! Relief finally. I can live with scaring not a problem. I finally felt some weight lifted and started focusing on getting ready for my surgery that was coming much sooner than expected.
Yes this all happened in a matter of less than 2 weeks. A crazy emotional ride. I am still not really processing any of it yet. I am not attached to my uterus at all its done its job to healthy beautiful kids what else could i ask for. yes I am only 34 but its better than waiting a few year and then have cancer all over my body. This is much easier to deal with and handle now while I am young. I will not feel less like a WOMEN! What does that mean anyway? My whole life from teenage years until now its done nothing but cause problems and a lot of pain! I am happy to see it go. I am a little concerned if they have to take my ovaries though. I am quite young to be on all hormones for the rest of my life and I know that they can cause breast cancer. But we will deal with that if it happens.
Out of all of this the one thing I keep thinking about and worrying about is Michael. This will have the biggest impact on him. I will not be able to pick him up for almost 4 weeks! He is already so frustrated and mad a lot of the time I am afraid this may make it 10 times worse for him. Yes Ken or someone will be around to help take care of him but I don't think Ken or anyone else knows how bad and how much energy I put in for Michael each day let alone each hour. I also know that it will be impossible for me not to help. Everyone keeps saying that it will be good for him and maybe it will but I still feel extremely uneasy about everything for Michael. the only other person besides me that has seen Michael at his worse and has dealt with him is my grandmother. She is worried to because she told me just last night "on his bad days it day really bad who is going to want to watch him?" I wish she was 20 years younger so she could! I know Michael can get through this but we have worked so hard to get to the place we are right now and I would hate for him to regress after all that hard work HE put in. I know Kaylee will be fine. She can do almost everything for herself and she understands whats going on. She is my resilient little girl who can adapt to anything. Ken is a wonderful father and loves his kids I just hope this experience will help him love on his children even more and not be a an overwhelming one.